


Pictures Are Worth 1,000 Words

by Random_Nerd3



Series: Snapshots [1]
Category: Julie and The Phantoms (TV)
Genre: Angst, Bobby - centric, Bobby is in a poly with Ray and Rose, Domestic Fluff, Five Stages of Grief, Fluff, Grief/Mourning, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Julie plays matchmaker between her dad and Trevor Wilson, Multi, No Beta I Die Like The Himbos, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Past Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, References to Depression, To Be Edited, Whump
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-15
Updated: 2020-11-29
Packaged: 2021-03-10 06:21:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 16,815
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27579077
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Random_Nerd3/pseuds/Random_Nerd3
Summary: In the present Julie realizes her dad is still struggling to come to terms with her mother's death so she sets out with Carlos on a quest to find someone who can make him smile again.In the past Bobby Wilson mourns the loss of his family, but with the support of Rose and Ray he discovers a whole new side of himself he thought he had locked away for good. Maybe everything was meant to happen for a reason.OrI'm back with more Bobby angst and wanted to somehow wrap Julie into the storyline without time travel so this monstrosity was born.
Relationships: Alex & Bobby | Trevor Wilson & Julie Molina & Luke Patterson & Reggie, Alex & Luke Patterson & Reggie (Julie and The Phantoms), Bobby | Trevor Wilson & Ray Molina & Rose, Bobby | Trevor Wilson/Rose/Ray Molina, Julie Molina/Luke Patterson
Series: Snapshots [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2016331
Comments: 68
Kudos: 130





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi!
> 
> I'm back with some Bobby whump because of the Bobby Stan Cult on Tumblr so uhhh blame them lmao. I don't really have an updating schedule for this one yet. I'm just going to update the series/fics as I go. Sorry this first chapter is so short, it's the first time I'm actually writing something in literal ages.
> 
> Enjoy!
> 
> ~R

There’s a shoebox in Molina's studio-sudo garage. Left to be forgotten by time long ago; buried underneath a pile of garbage bags and was never meant to see the light of day again. But one day… one day Ray couldn’t help it anymore and decided to go through his little dream box full of memories from a time when he, Rose and Bobby were all happy together.

The boys found the box by accident. At least; that’s what they told Julie when she walked in and saw the mess on the piano. Pictures, polaroids, were strewn all over the top of her mom’s piano. Folded up sheets of paper strewn all over the place; incomplete songs and love letters written in her mother’s hand writing. “What the _heck_ is going on here?!” She asked, dropping her backpack on the ground with a loud _thud_. Reggie winced and she cringed, remembering a conversation they had about his parents and their fighting. “Sorry Reggie, I didn’t mean to yell…” Julie apologized, taking his smile as an apology. 

“Reggie poofed in the garage last week and saw your dad going through this box of old stuff,” Luke explained as he gestured to the mess on the piano. Julie narrowed her eyebrows and crossed her arms.

“So you thought it would be a good idea to go through my dad’s private stuff?” She asked half-scolding them. Reggie instantly backed away from the table, his arms up and palms facing out.

“It was all Luke’s idea! I told him about seeing Ray going through the box and Luke tricked me into showing him where it was!” Reggie exclaimed, tripping backwards over the piano bench. Julie stifled a laugh, then noticed how _still_ Luke was. She took a hesitant step forward and could see the now-crinkled picture in his hand.

“It’s him,” Luke said, his voice so low she would’ve missed it if she wasn’t so close to him. “Guys it’s _Bobby_.” His hand was shaking now, muscles tense as he leaned against the piano for support. Julie wrapped Luke’s hand with hers and it seemed to calm him down, so she leaned further into him, pressing into his warmth.

“Wait,” Julie said, recognizing the girl Bobby was posing with. “He’s standing with my mom. Why didn’t you guys tell me you knew her?” She asked, eyes starting to fill with unshed tears. Alex peered over her shoulder and snickered. 

“Hey Reg,” Alex said teasingly. “Looks like her mom was _size beautiful_.” Luke let out a choked coughing sound and Reggie’s eyes widened in realization. Julie frowned slightly,

“Size beautiful?” She asked, confusion dipping into her voice. Reggie’s cheeks flushed bright red as Luke made a gagging sound from the back of his throat. “Alex what’s so funny?” Julie demanded when the drummer doubled over in laughter, wrapping his stomach with his arms.

“Reggie, Luke, and Bobby all flirted with your mom. She worked at the Orpheum, right? We met her the - well, the day we died. I guess she and Bobby must’ve kept in touch or something,” Alex said with a shrug. Julie lightly took the small bundled up stack of pictures from Luke’s hand and flipped them over so they could read the sticky note taped to the other side.

“The funerals…” Julie whispered, reading the words out loud. A tear fell onto the picture but it wasn’t hers. Turning to her right she could see the sadness in Bobby’s eyes reflected in Luke’s.

“I don’t know why but I -” Luke let out a choked hiccup. “I guess I always thought he never went to our funerals.” Alex grabbed the small stack of pictures tied up by the rubberband and thumbed through them.

“Shit,” Alex muttered as he undid the rubber band to spread out the images. “He went to all of our funerals.” Julie’s heart clenched, she hated it whenever her boys were sad and she couldn’t really do anything to make it better.

“I don’t… you guys…” Reggie said trailing off as his little sniffling sounds filled the air. Julie wrapped her arm around Luke tighter and she pulled her in for a hug.

“Hey guys, looks like Rose and Bobby were together. Dumbass vegetarian actually managed to pick up a girl with that line,” Alex said with a chuckle. He put the funeral pictures aside and was reading an aged sheet of paper. Julie snatched it from him and couldn’t help but smile at the image that was folded up inside of it. Both her mom and her dad were in it _with_ Bobby this time. Bobby still had that sad look on his face, like it was hard for him to smile. Julie’s parents on the other hand both looked like they were idiots in love, curled around Bobby in the back of a van.

“He took Lucille! If he sent her to a dump I’m going to kill him,” Reggie promised. Julie turned to Alex for help and he shrugged in response.

“Reggie got emotionally attached to Sunset Curve’s van and named it Lucille even though Bobby was the one who actually bought it,” Alex explained.

“It looks like they were all together,” Julie said unable to hold back how surprised she sounded. “Like, these are all from dates and stuff…” she trailed off as the boys continued to look through the pictures of their old bandmate.

“He looks…” Reggie trailed off when they started to uncover folded up pieces of paper that ended up being love letters and silly little love songs.

“He looks happy,” Luke said, eyes on one particular picture that caught Bobby mid-laugh, his eyes sparkling at someone off-camera. Julie couldn’t help but feel a little bit hurt that her dad hadn’t shared this part of his life with her. “I can’t remember the last time he looked that happy,” Luke said. That her mom hadn’t said anything about it before she died, or that Trevor Wilson didn’t bring up the fact he used to date both of them in the nineties. Her dad looked so happy in the pictures, surrounded by the people he loved. If Julie had any say in the matter she was going to figure out a way to make her dad this happy again.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The night of Sunset Curve's big debut Bobby loses three of his best friends, but then he gains two more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!
> 
> I didn't mean to finish this chapter so early but I did so here you go! Hopefully you all like it. This fic'll rotate between the 2020's with the band and the 90's with Bobby, Rose, and Ray. aidhgapeiapskdfj all of your sweet comments give me life and free serotonin so thank you so much for all the positive feedback. Hopefully this fic inspires more Bobby-centric fics throughout the fandom! Also Rose and Ray speak a little bit of Spanish and I found the translations on google so it might end up being wrong but they basically just both call Bobby their little musician and it's all very angsty and domestic soft.
> 
> Enjoy,
> 
> ~ Ren

Bobby didn’t play the Orpheum. When the ambulance sirens screamed through the Orpheum walls something twisted in his gut and he just  _ knew _ . Without thinking he ditched Rose at the bar counter - she ended up following him out to the back lot. He passed by a man wearing a hat leaning against the wall near the side doors then the cold metal of the door slammed against his shoulder and he stumbled onto the pavement in time to see the ambulance turn down the street. A pedestrian, god bless her soul she was one of the old ladies from the book club Sunset Curve played at, told Bobby the ambulance was from LA General. His mind stopped being connected to his body and Rose dragged him to her car, her boyfriend already in the driver’s seat.

He spent the night at Rose’s apartment, he learned her name when she checked them in at the hospital.  _ “Hi I’m Rose. Yes he’s their brother… his name’s Bobby,” _ Rose said, lying to the receptionist only for him to hear his best friends were dead on arrival. The assholes didn’t even give him a chance to say goodbye and now he wouldn’t be able to tell them how much he loved him. He’d planned on doing it after they played the gig, confessing his long-repressed feelings for his bandmates. He was tired of living on the outside of their little love triangle, he wanted them to know how much he cared about them. He was going to kiss Luke after they ended their final song in the green room. He should’ve been with them. He was  _ supposed _ to be with them.

Rose and Ray took him home with them, his parents were both working late and they refused to let spend the night alone. Even though they were both strangers to him. Ray had driven the three of them back to his and Rose’s shared apartment despite Bobby insisting he’d be fine on his own… if by being fine he meant he was planning on slipping into a bar with his fake ID to drink his pain away or raid his parent’s liquor cabinet. Unfortunately Ray saw through his lie; it was probably easy considering he’d spent the past five hours being a blubbering mess falling apart in both of their arms. God, if Bobby hadn’t ran into Rose and had to go through all this alone… he didn’t want to even _ think _ about the person he would’ve become. “I can hear you thinking from here you know,” Rose said from her side of the bed. She shifted, rolling onto her side so she was facing him.

“Sorry,” Bobby said, wincing at how dry his voice sounded. He wouldn’t be able to sing for a few days due to how hoarse it was. In all honesty after seeing the corpses of his bandmates Bobby probably wouldn’t be able to sing again. “Just thinking…” He said, trailing off crossing his arms against his chest. He collapsed over Luke’s body when he had to go in to ID Reggie because the kid’s parents couldn’t even be there for their son after death. Rose stood by him through everything, she just wrapped an arm around him and let him cry. He insisted on taking the couch, but Rose’s boyfriend, Ray, must either be a trusting person or an idiot because he told Bobby he could share the only bed in the apartment with Rose. The darkness made it hard to see, but if he focused he could see her eyes shining at him, her head propped up against her hand, arm bent at the elbow. 

“Yes, we’ve established you’re the one with half a brain cell. Anything you want to talk about?” Rose asked, leaning down to press a soft kiss to his forehead. A wave of tiredness washed over him, but his thoughts still went a mile a minute, doubts and mourning and the conflict over what he was  _ supposed _ to be feeling versus what he actually was feeling. Grief affects everyone differently but right now he just felt so… so empty inside of him. A heavy weight settling on his chest, making it hard for him to breathe. He felt something dark start to creep into the corners of his mind, thoughts he didn’t want to think. Instead of saying any of that though, he fell back into his old pattern of repressing his emotions, compartmentalizing everything so he didn’t have to deal with the nasty feeling of loneliness snaking around his spine.

“You sure Ray’s okay with us sleeping in the same bed?” Bobby asked half-joking. He shifted, stretching his arms over his head with a yawn he put his hands against the back of his head. “Cause if I were him I’d be jealous if my hot girlfriend spent the night with a super cool rhythm guitarist.” Bobby said with a wiggle of his eyebrows. Rose scoffed,

“You  _ wish _ Bobby,” Rose said acting insulted. He could hear her smile though, so he knew she wasn’t truly upset at him. “Ray just knows you shouldn’t be left alone tonight.” Bobby hummed softly, the song  _ Now Or Never _ played in his head in a cruel twist of fate. Rose started to trace a relaxing pattern on his forehead. When Bobby’s eyes fluttered he could almost convince himself the fingers were Luke’s, not Roses. He quickly grew lax and pliable, letting her pull him in for a hug. He nuzzled into her shoulder, letting her move him around until he was lying in a more comfortable position. For the first time since finding out his friends died Bobby let himself breathe.

“I should be dead too,” Bobby said, finally voicing the truth. “If I went with them instead of flirting with you. I wouldn’t have… they were all so young Rose. So goddamn _young_ -” he cut himself off with a choked sob, keeping his face buried in her shoulder. Rose clutched to him, letting him dissolve once more in her arms; body wracking with wave after wave of ugly sounding sobs.

“Hey, if you went with them we wouldn’t have met,” Rose said, placing a soft kiss on the top of Bobby’s head. Bobby let out another heart wrenching sob. He knew he was probably staining her sweatshirt, but he couldn’t bring himself to care at the moment. He squeezed his eyes shut, like if he opened them again Luke would be lying next to him and not Rose. Reggie’d be on his otherside, snoring the night away and Alex would be strewn across the three of them; drooling on the sheets.

“I’m sorry,” Bobby whispered into her shoulder. He wasn’t too sure she heard it, but he had to say it. “It was all my fault…” he said, trailing off when he started to trip over his words again.

“Hush,” Rose cooed, running her hands through his hair. Bobby managed to get his breathing under control, long drawn out breaths matching hers. “Don’t talk like that. The doctor said it was food poisoning. If you went with them you’d be dead too.” The thought was nice but Bobby was convinced otherwise. Maybe if he went with them he’d take the first bite and then he’d show the symptoms first and save his band. Maybe if he went with them he would’ve been able to call the ambulance sooner.

“‘S the truth,” Bobby mumbled. Rose pressed another soft kiss, this time at the crown of his forehead. He refused to meet her eyes, choosing to stare down instead. Rose used a finger to tip his chin up, and his eyes met hers, shining through the dark.

“I never want to hear you talk like that again  _ mi querido musico. _ You survived which means you can use your gift and play their songs. You can keep their memory alive, they’re still with you - in their music,” Rose said softly, leaning forward to press their foreheads together. Bobby stayed silent because as much as he didn’t want to admit it… she was right. He was kept alive for a reason. He could keep their memories alive too.

  
  


“I brought you both an extra blanket,” Ray’s voice whispered, leaning down to tuck the thick blanket around him and Rose. Bobby buried himself into it, Rose’s soft singing filling his ears. He couldn’t understand most of it - she was singing in Spanish. He could tell it was supposed to be a lullaby though, something soft and comforting filling his mind.

“Thanks,” Bobby managed to say as his eyelids started to flutter more often. Ray pressed a kiss to the side of his head, ruffling his hair with a light chuckle. Ray’s laugh was warm and full. He painfully reminded Bobby of Reggie, the way he carded his fingers through his hair slowly. It was almost exactly like what the bassist used to do whenever Bobby woke up from a nightmare. It felt nice, something to focus on that wasn’t the cold shadow of death that seemed to follow Bobby around.

“Go to sleep Bobby. I promise we’ll both be here for you in the morning,” Ray whispered, Rose humming in agreement. Unable to keep his eyes open any longer the world around Bobby fazed out and he dreamed of Luke’s smile, and Reggie’s laugh sounded so crystal clear in the haze. The beat of drums set to the anxious pitter patter of Alex’s heartbeat filled his mind.

When he woke up the flash of a camera filled his vision and Bobby realized he was half hanging off the bed drooling on the wood bedroom floor. Rose was lying sideways, her foot kicking at his head. “Hey!” Bobby protested when Ray let the color seep into the polaroid he took. “You better not show that to anyone!” Ray’s eyes twinkled back at him as he scribbled something down at the bottom of the picture with a permanent marker.

“Ignore him,” Rose mumbled as she twisted around in the blankets. “Idiot wants to take pictures of everything.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yell at me on Tumblr: @Random-Nerd-3


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Julie uncovers more about her parent's now-mysterious past... and maybe finds out a few secrets about her boys as she snoops.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!
> 
> I hope this chapter reads okay. Carlos is in this fic now! He and Julie just want their dad to be happy again but not without a plethora of angst first! The chapter is short but hey, it's out!
> 
> ~ R

“What are you looking at?” Carlos asked, suddenly appearing behind Julie, making her yelp in surprise. “Are the guys here? Are these pictures of them from the -” Julie reached out and clamped a hand over his mouth cutting off his rush of questions.

“The guys are here.” Julie said, lowering her voice so he’d hopefully pick up they were looking at something that their dad probably didn’t want them seeing. “I’ll tell you what we’re doing but you have to promise you won’t go running to dad okay?” Julie asked, hoping her brother could keep a secret. Carlos’s eyes shined with excitement as he nodded frantically. The boys made themselves visible as Julie pulled her hand away from his mouth. Grabbing one of the many pictures on the piano she showed him a picture of Bobby and their parents in the back of a van during a drive-in festival.

“I don’t… I don’t understand. Mom cheated on dad?” Carlos asked, eyes flickering with a large array of emotions. Julie shook her head, letting him take the picture so he could get a closer look at it. The picture showed the three of them, Bobby, Rose, and Ray in the back of a van. Bobby was sandwiched between their parents, both Rose and Ray curled up on his chest trapping him in place. Bobby was glaring at the camera but there was a twinkle in his eye that said he wasn’t really angry.

“I don’t think so. That guy in the middle?” Julie asked, pointing Bobby out. “That’s Trevor Wilson. He used to be the rhythm guitarist for the guys’ band. I guess somewhere along the line the three of them must’ve gotten together.” Carlos’s eyes furrowed together and Julie had to refrain from reaching forward to ruffle his hair. 

“You can do that?” Carlos asked, honestly sounding curious about it. He glanced at the photo in his hands again, looking at it in a new light. Julie nodded, noting the slight confused sound from Luke’s direction.

“It’s called polyamory. And as long as all parties involved know what’s happening then it’s okay.” Julie said giving in and turning to face her boys, the three of them had a haunted expression shadowed across their faces.

“There’s a  _ name _ for it?” Reggie asked, voice squeaking an octave higher on the word name. Julie frowned slightly, noting how concerned her boys were getting. Alex hummed,

“I told you guys there was a name for it now. You didn’t believe me, like always!” He exclaimed, starting to anxiously spin a drumstick in his hand. Julie held up a hand, trying to regain control of the room before Alex went on a downward spiral of anxiety.

“Luke, what’s going on?” Julie asked him, well aware of Carlos watching the entire interaction happen. Luke shot a look to Alex and Reggie and it felt like they were having a silent discussion. Julie wasn’t allowed to be a part of. Before she could feel too left out Luke let out a frustrated sounding groan and poofed across the studio to the dart board. Carlos grinned at the chance of being able to see ghost powers at work but Julie couldn’t help but feel  _ more _ concerned for her boys.

“It’s uhh…” Reggie started, before trailing off when Luke chucked a dart at the board with a  _ thunk _ . 

“I can’t  _ believe _ him!” Luke exclaimed, obviously frustrated about something. “The whole time… we dropped hints all the time, right? I thought he was straight or… or that he didn’t like guys like us but if those pictures were anything to go by Bobby  _ did _ .” He threw the last dart at the board and it bounced off the target, clattering to the floor.

“You three were together?” Julie asked quietly, not wanting to overstep any boundaries. During his fit of anger she crossed the distance between them and stood at his side. Luckily Luke didn’t yell at her, instead he turned to her with those sad puppy dog eyes. “Luke?” She prompted gently, reaching out to grab his hand gently.

“Yeah. Yeah, we were. The three of us against the world well, the three of us and  _ Bobby _ against the world. I loved him Jules. ‘S why it hurt so much,” Luke said, letting her lurch forward to bury her head in his chest. He wrapped his arms around her tightly, holding her close. Leaning down he nuzzled his nose into the top of her hair and she let out a watery chuckle sound. She pulled away and wiped her eyes with the back of her hand.

“It looks like dad loved him too,” Carlos said. Turning around Julie saw him peering over the piano on his tip-toes, taking a look at more of the pictures. “And mom… I wonder why Trevor left them.” Carlos said, voicing Julie’s inner thought. If they were as love as the pictures showed them to be, then why did Trevor go and bump uglies with Carrie’s mom?

“The other day when I caught Ray looking at the box he was talking about feeling lonely… like he felt he lost his two first loves even though one of them is technically still alive,” Reggie said, settling for slumping onto Luke’s couch.

“Guys I’ve got it!” Julie exclaimed when she read the poem she took from Carlos. It was written for Ray by Trevor, confessing his love. “We need to get my dad and Trevor back together again! Then maybe he’ll be happier, like he was when mom was still alive.” A sense of heaviness filled the air but she shook it off, nothing could deter her from setting her dad up on a date.

“Jules,” Luke said quietly. “This is Trevor Wilson we’re talking about. He literally  _ stole _ all of my original music.” Julie crossed her arms against her chest, Carlos deciding to follow her lead.

“I’m the man of the house,” Carlos said, ignoring Alex’s scoff. “And I say we trick Trevor and dad into going on a date together!” Julie grinned, knowing she won Luke over. If Carlos wanted to do it then that meant Reggie wanted to do it, and if Reggie did something then the other two phantoms were sure to follow his lead. The next step in their cooked up plan filled Julie with dread, but it was something that had to be done. 

She was going to call Carrie and try to talk to her.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another 90's chapter! 
> 
> Bobby gets whumped and drinks some beer, but Rose is there to make sure he's okay.
> 
> Now extended with bonus Ray/Bobby fluff at the end!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi.
> 
> Was I planning on releasing another chapter? No. Does my hyperfixation care? Apparently not either.
> 
> Enjoy!
> 
> ~R

The next few weeks passed by and Bobby spent them in a haze. He felt like he was wading through a pool full of jello, just barely able to keep his head above water. Waking up was a struggle; most days he wanted to go right back to sleep because dreaming was the only way he could see Luke’s face. Dreaming was the only way he was able to  _ forget. _ But then he’d wake up in a cold sweat, his hair matted down to his head and Rose and Ray on opposite sides - the only constant that seems to actually stay in his life.

Initially Bobby had no willpower to drag himself to the services but the corner had called Rose after fifty missed calls to Bobby saying if someone didn’t pick up Reggie’s body he’d just be thrown into the incinerator. Apparently Reggie’s parents couldn’t stop being at each other’s throats to even  _ notice _ their son being dead.

So now, two weeks after what would’ve been Sunset Curve’s debut performance; Bobby found himself sitting in the funeral director’s office with Rose at his side. Ray wanted to be there when they went, but he was swamped with photography gigs and Bobby promised they wouldn’t sign anything today. “As you can see Mr. Wilson, we always provide the best for our clients.” The funeral director, Mr. Johnson said as he slid into his chair. Who knew there were so many casket options?

“You can’t be serious,” Rose said, leaning back in her chair with one leg folded over the other and her arms crossed. “All due respect Mr. Johnson but I doubt these are the least expensive options you have available.” Bobby stayed silent, slowly going through the binder of casket options Mr. Johnson handed him. None of the options dipped below the two-thousand dollar price range. Everything was so  _ damn _ expensive, he’d have to ask his parents for help to pay for it. The last thing Bobby wanted to do was go to his parents for help. The loved him, he knew that, but anytime he asked them for a little bit of cash they’d go off on how they had to pinch every penny they earned already. Essentially when it came to planning Reggie’s funeral, he was on his own. Mr. Johnson cleared his throat and adjusted his tie, turning around to pull out another binder.

“We do have other types of burial Miss. Rose,” Mr. Johnson said, handing her the second binder. Bobby barely blinked when he took away the first one. “Cremation is often the most cost-effective option, but you wouldn’t be able to bury your friend physically like the Pattersons and Hamiltons are doing for  _ their _ sons.” Bobby swallowed thickly as he watched Rose flick through the binder of urn options. 

He couldn’t help the feeling of guilt that was starting to curdle in the pit of his stomach. He never thought he’d have to decide on how Reggie would be buried. He never thought of a life outside of Sunset Curve. The boys were… he loved them just as much as they loved each other. If Bobby cremated Reggie would the three of them still end up in the same afterlife? “Of course, there are more… religious options if our young Reginald was practicing a religion.” Bobby shook his head, anger seeping into his veins. How  _ dare _ this man make assumptions about a kid he’d never even met before. That he thought he knew better just because he was trying to squeeze Bobby for all he was worth.

“Reggie wasn’t - he wasn’t religious,” Bobby said, cutting Mr. Johnson off from whatever his next selling pitch was going to be. He leaned over Rose’s shoulder, taking a peek at the urns. “Maybe… maybe the uh… the cremation would be better,” Bobby managed to croak out. “We don’t really have a lot of money.” His throat was scratchy from all the crying he did throughout the week. Rose reached one of her hands out, covering his with hers.

“Of course Mr. Wilson,” Mr. Johnson said, pulling out a small stack of pages stapled together. “Will you be paying in cash or in credit?” Bobby moved to take the contract but Rose beat him to it.

“We’re not signing anything today. We promised a third person we’d talk to them first, but we’ll be back by the end of the week.” Rose said, ending the meeting herself. Mr. Johnson looked taken aback but he recovered his external emotions quickly.

“Whatever you think is best Miss. Rose,” Mr. Johnson said. He pushed his chair back so he could walk them both out of his office. “I’ll be looking forward to our next conversation.” Bobby was staring at his shoes, his fists shoved into the pockets of Reggie’s leather jacket. He took it when they went to claim the body, it was originally his after all… for some reason Reggie just liked to steal his clothes.

“Thank you for your time,” Rose said, obviously unhappy about Mr. Johnson’s priorities. The weight of her arm dropped over Bobby’s shoulder and soon she was guiding him back to where they parked Lucille. Bobby settled into the passenger seat on the right side of the van while Rose slammed the driver side door to his left. “El diablo, ese hombre es un  _ idiota _ !” Rose exclaimed, checking her mirrors before she pulled out of the parking lot. Bobby couldn’t help but let a small smile curve at the corner of his lips. 

“Rose. English,” Bobby said after she finished her rant. She sighed heavily, turning onto the street their apartment building was on. He opened the glove compartment and dug around in it until he found what he was looking for. One of the mini drug-store bottles of liquor was buried under a pile of manager cards and flyers for the gigs Sunset Curve played. Despite Rose’s noise of complaint Bobby ripped the seal off and unscrewed the lid, swallowing the whole bottle in a few quick gulps. He exhaled and wiped his mouth off with the back of his hand, letting the feeling of fuzzy fill his mind. The feeling of guilt was replaced with self-hatred, but the drowsiness from the alcohol made it hard for him to focus on anything but the cool of the glass on his forehead.

“You’re an idiot, you know that right?” Rose asked, switching to English. Bobby ignored her and opened a second mini bottle and downed it. He hated himself for doing it, falling for the alcoholic trap. He promised his boys he’d never drink, they all did as a side effect of Reggie’s dad being an alcoholic drunk. Bobby’s mom was an alcoholic too though, and the one night he managed to escape from Rose and Ray’s thumb he ran home to grab a few more things he’d need. The bottle was just  _ sitting _ there, taunting him on the kitchen table half-drunk. He was ensnared after the first taste.

  
  


“‘M not the one driving,” Bobby said, his words already starting to slur together. Rose glanced at him pittingly before turning back to the road. He knew she was expecting him to break down again, to fall apart into a melted puddle of tears and rubber bones. In all honesty, he half-expected it to happen too. He was done crying though, at least for now. Bobby just leaned his head back against the headrest and turned to face away from her, staring down at the speeding road below them. The coolness of the glass washed over him and he shifted so more of his forehead could rest on it. “Today was a big day Robbie,” Rose said. They pulled up to a red light so she closed the distance between them and placed a kiss right above his ear. Bobby nodded, quickly finding it easy to zone out of the real world. He pulled Reggie’s jacket around him tighter in a weak attempt at creating the sensation of one of the bassist’s warm hugs.

“I just want to… I want to do this  _ right _ . Reggie deserves better than this, better than me.” Bobby said, his voice just barely above a whisper. He pulled his legs up to his chest, the seatbelt made the position a little uncomfortable but he made it work. Rose didn’t say anything protesting against his lack of self-worth like she usually did. Instead she just let the heavy air settle between them and the rock of guilt in his chest plummeted further into his gut.

“I know you do mi amor,” Rose said as they pulled into a parking space in the front of the cheap apartment building they lived in. “We’ll do everything we can to give Reggie a proper send off, I promise.” Rose never broke her promises, that was one of the reasons Bobby loved her - wait  _ what _ ? - so much. She was so trusting, so trustworthy. Bobby could count on her for anything, Ray too for that matter.

“Thanks,” Bobby mumbled, a wave of exhaustion washing over him. Today had been more tiring than he thought it would be initially. He didn’t realize how… how soulbreaking picking out a burial method for one of his loves was going to be. He hated Reggie’s parents with a passion for making their brother’s friend plan out his burial.

“I’ll always be here mi querido. You, Ray, and I are stuck together forever,” Rose promised, never letting go of him as they stumbled up the stairs. The elevator was out of order - again - that was also the only other constant in Bobby’s life.

“Forever’s a long time,” Bobby said, tripping when his foot caught on the welcome mat in their doorway. Rose caught him before he ate the floor, her hand tightening around his wrist. “Buy me dinner first,” Bobby said with a smirk. The line would’ve sounded cool if his opening line with her wasn’t about him being a vegetarian. Rose laughed, the sound warm in Bobby’s chest.

“I already have  _ idiota _ . Let’s get you to the couch,” Rose said, throwing his arm over his back so they could both stumble across the floor. Bobby toppled onto the couch, face planting as his face smashed into the cushion. “Hey!” Rose exclaimed when Bobby sat up just to pull her down to lay with him. “I have to go to work!” She complained, but she let him bury his face in her hair. When he pulled away she twisted so they were lying facing each other. He pulled out his puppy eyes, Luke had taught him well. “Fine amour  _ five minutes _ ,” Rose said, knowing when she’s lost a battle.

“Hmmm… love you,” Bobby mumbled, letting the effects of the alcohol settle into his mind. The tiredness crashed over him. Rose reached out and ruffled his hair but he didn’t care enough to fix it. Instead he just turned his face away from her, lower lip jutting out as he pouted.

“Dulces sueños mi amour,” Rose whispered as a comforting storm of darkness swarmed his mind. Bobby let his eyes flutter shut, comforted by Rose’s presence, the smell of her coconut shampoo filling his nose.

When Bobby woke up the annoying thudding of a hangover pulsed in his brain. He groaned and unpeeled his face from the couch cushion, half-expecting Rose to still be on the other side of the couch. She wasn’t there though, having left the apartment to cover her shift at the diner she worked at. “Fuck,” Bobby swore, wanting nothing more than to just fall back to sleep. He sniffed the air, scrunching his nose in disgust, Reggie’s jacket was starting to smell. Shrugging the jacket off he laid it against the armrest of the couch and reached for the water bottle sitting on the cocktail table. Someone left him a bottle of painkillers next to the water so he took to and gulped down half the bottle so he didn’t dry swallow them.

“You promised,” Ray’s voice said, sounding in the room. Bobby ran a hand through his hair and looked to the kitchen, where Ray was cooking him something that smelled like pure  _ heaven _ . He was facing the stove, flipping over a few pancakes. “I came home and you… you were lying passed out couch Bobby, that can’t  _ happen _ . I know, believe me I  _ know _ how hard this is but alcohol isn’t the answer. If Rose didn’t page me I would’ve driven you straight to the hospital. You -” Bobby cut him off by crossing the distance between them; tripping over the air as he stumbled across the room.

“‘M sorry Ray,” Bobby said, falling forward to wrap his arms around Ray’s waist, pressing his face into his back. “I didn’t mean to scare you I just… meeting with the funeral director just… it all got so much more  _ real _ .” Ray sighed heavily and Bobby knew he was more worried than angry. He turned off the stove then turned around to return the hug; pulling Bobby in close.

“I know. I know Bobby, come here,” Ray said, holding him close. Bobby let himself relax into Ray’s hold. His hugs were different from what Rose’s were. Hers were soft and she snaked her arms around Bobby’s waist, but Ray’s arms were much bigger than Rose’s. A side effect from having to lug all of his photography equipment around, but it worked out in Bobby’s favor because Ray’s hugs were the  _ best _ thing in the world. “I wish I could’ve been there today,” Ray admitted, turning around to slide a few pancakes onto a plate for him and Bobby. 

“Nothing interesting happened… We looked at casket pricings. The funeral home director tried to con me into buying some expensive shit. I wasn’t really paying attention, Rose did most of the talking. I think we talked about cremation… it’s the cheapest burial thing.” Bobby said, taking a bite of his breakfast. Ray’s eyes sparkled at the mention of the missing party of their little trio.

“She’s good at that,” Ray said with a smile splitting across his face. His smile was contagious, he always brightened Bobby’s mood whenever they were together.

“You lucked out with her,” Bobby said chasing the pancakes down with a gulp of orange juice. The thud from the glass spiked his headache so he blinked, trying to stay focused on what Ray was saying.

“We lucked out with her,” Ray said, flashing a smile at Bobby. He felt his cheeks heat up in response, the color going all the way to his chest. His brain was still muddled from the hangover so he wasn’t exactly sure he heard Ray right.

“We lucked out with her?” Bobby asked, his brain trying to catch up to what Ray said. Ray nodded,

“Yeah Bobby.  _ We _ lucked out with her,” Ray said, leaning across the table to ruffle his hair. When the loading screen in his mind reached 100% his eyes widened.

“You mean you both… want me?” Bobby asked, hoping he wasn’t reaching. Ray nodded, his eyes glinting with something Bobby couldn’t place.

“We know it’s soon so you don’t have to give us an answer yet but… yes. She’s definitely going to kill me for telling you without her being here. We want  _ you _ ,” Ray said with such conviction Bobby couldn’t figure out a reason to doubt him.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Julie makes up with Carrie and the two of them and Flynn start plotting a surprise date for Trevor and Ray, guest staring a performance from both Julie and the Phantoms and Dirty Candi.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!.
> 
> Once again this fic is getting away from me. I just want to turn this into a full-fleged Bobby angst fic but to do that I have to wrap up the 2020 storyline first lmao. This chapter felt really rushed, but Julie's a bisexual disaster in it so I think that's valid.
> 
> Comments are always appreciated and give me free serotonin.
> 
> Enjoy!
> 
> ~R

Julie waited for Monday to give her enough time to mentally prepare herself for the conversation with Carrie. They used to be friends, back when her mom was alive and somehow knew Trevor well enough for Julie to be allowed to go over to his _mansion_ of a house and dance in his studio with Carrie. Overtime though the four of them just sort of… grew apart. Carrie’s mom leaving was the first domino that tipped, causing Carrie to become trapped in her dance group and never having time for anything else. Julie was hurt at the time, and confused because she didn’t understand why Carrie wasn’t talking to her since _she_ didn’t do anything wrong… She never really got an answer for that question, instead focusing on strengthening her friendship with Flynn. Then one day her mom got sick, and Julie hasn’t been able to hold a conversation with Carrie to save her life.

“Carrie?” Julie asked quietly, reaching up to tap her shoulder. Carrie slammed her locker shut and whipped around, her eyes widened in shock. “I just want to talk,” she said, any confidence she had before walking up to Carrie dissipating. Crossing her arms Carrie leaned against her locker, motioning for her Dirty Candi girls to leave them alone. Kalya gave Julie and Flynn a friendly wave before following the other girls into class.

“Alright,” Carrie said dryly, eyeing Flynn carefully. “Talk Molina I don’t have all day.” Julie took a deep breath then finally said what’s been on her mind since last Friday.

“Yourdadandmyparentsusedtoalldateeachother!” Julie exclaimed, her words rushed and crushed together in her panic. Flynn’s reassuring hand squeezed her shoulder. Carrie raised an eyebrow in confusion.

“I’m sorry, say that again?” Carrie asked, surprisingly sounding concerned. Julie exhaled loudly, drawing out the sigh as long as she could in a poor attempt to stall.

“You dad and my parents…” she trailed off, suddenly sensing the awkwardness in the air between them. Carrie’s eyes softened at the mention of her mom so Julie continued. “They were together - dating - back in the nineties.” Julie admitted, reaching up to awkwardly scratch the back of her neck. Carrie’s jaw set as a rush of emotions crossed her face ranging from confusion to anger before settling on something resembling a look of understanding.

“What do you want me to do about it?” Carrie asked, her eyebrows furrowing together. Julie hesitated then said,

“I think… _Carlos_ and I think that it’ll be a good idea if we set our dads up on a date.” She braced for the expected backlash of a harsh comment and a snide insult but Carrie just sighed and leaned against the locker for support.

“I agree,” Carrie said, a wry smile stretching across her face when Julie’s expression twisted into surprise. “What? Despite _popular belief_ I’m not a demon. I care about people.” _Ouch_ , Julie thought when her demon comment settled in. She supposed she deserved that though, hissing demon at Carrie as she passed her and Flynn down the hallway.

“Sorry, we’re just not used to seeing the _good_ side of Carrie Wilson,” Flynn pointed out. Julie whacked her arm with glare warning her to stop. Flynn just shrugged. Carrie shook her head,

“No Julie, she’s right. After my mom left and my dad stopped showing up for things that weren’t performances I sort of… I went off the deep end.” Carrie’s eyes softened, she reached out to place a hand on Julie’s shoulder. “I don’t want to be that person anymore.” Carrie said, ignoring Flynn’s noise of surprise. Julie smiled brightly up at her, proud of how far she’s come since the day she stopped talking to them.

“I’m looking forward to meeting this New Carrie,” Julie said bypassing Carrie’s outstretched in and charging forward to trap her in a hug. Carrie hesitated at first, but after a nod from Flynn she returned the hug, letting Julie squeeze her tightly. It felt like nothing had changed, like there wasn’t four years of bad blood between them, and that was all Julie could hold on to.

“Get your ass in this group hug,” Carrie said to Flynn, looking over Julie’s shoulder. Flynn took the initiative and suddenly Julie was stuck, trapped between her two best friends who couldn’t stand being in the same room at once. After the hug - which lasted long enough for Julie’s hair to get matted against her back - the three of them separated. “So Julie what’s the plan?” Carrie asked her, walking with them to class.

“To be honest I don’t really know yet... ” Julie admitted, shoving her hands into her hoodie pocket. “I just know I don’t want my dad to look so sad anymore. He thinks he hides it but he’s worse at keeping secrets than Nick.” Carrie smirked at the jab at their mutual friend.

“I have noticed my dad acting weird lately… weirder than normal. Maybe a date is what he needs to get him back to normal.” She admitted, a wistful tone in her voice.

“We can set up a date in like, one week!” Carrie exclaimed, her eyes glistening mischievously. Julie eyed her suspiciously,

“What do you have in mind?” Julie asked, hoping she hadn’t bitten off more than she could chew. Sometimes Carrie went a bit… well, she went _crazy_ when she got to plan a date for someone. When Julie told her about her crush on Nick when they were thirteen Carrie set up a _very_ dramatic picnic in the park for them but in the end Julie chickened out on asking him so she took Flynn instead.

“Well, you know how they both like rock? What if we convinced them both to go to a Julie and the Phantoms gig, with Dirty Candi closing of course, and let them figure things out while they watch both of our bands pull of _killer_ sets.” Carrie said, emphasizing the word killer.

“That sounds -” Julie started before Flynn cut her off.

“ _\- brilliant!”_ Flynn exclaimed with a squeal. “It could be the start of a set of double performances!” Julie winced when Flynn squealed again, this time directly in her ear. “Julie! Double Trouble could perform between the groups! This is going to be _so_ badass!” Julie tried to stop the idea, but Carrie and Flynn walked ahead of her. Both of them animantley talking about possible sets and costumes and well… it was the first time the two most important girls in Julie’s life were able to hold a conversation without it turning nasty so she let them take over the performance planning, following them into the classroom.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments shoot serotonin straight into the single braincell I own so please leave reviews in order to give me more braincells and also serotonin.
> 
> Sorry if that sentence didn't make sense. I'm very discombobulated right now.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bobby attends Alex and Luke's funeral services. While he mourns the loss of the people he once loved he begins to learn his heart might just be a little bigger than he expected.
> 
> cw: alcoholism, drunkenness, homophobia.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi.
> 
> Was this supposed to end up being nearly 2k words long? No. So uh enjoy 2k words of pining and mourning Bobby.  
> I didn't include Bobby getting Reggie's ashes b/c otherwise that would've just added on another 2k words of angsty bobby and we don't have time for that in this fic.
> 
> Spanish translations were taken from google translate because I failed Spanish 1 in high school and am not bilingual.
> 
> ~R

The week following his initial visit to the funeral home and Ray confessing his and Rose’s love over pancakes like it was a regular Monday morning. Bobby found himself in Rose and Ray’s apartment standing in front of their bathroom mirror struggling with his suit tie. 

They to go to the funerals today, Alex and Luke getting a shared service.. Alex’s parents justified it as some sort of way to ensure the boys were at peace in between the bible verses they were spewing out. Bobby wasn’t really paying attention at the time to be honest. Instead he took the opportunity to take in the sight of Luke and Alex wearing tailored suits, arms crossed as they laid in the coffins.  _ Luke would’ve hated wearing a suit to his funeral, _ Bobby thought. He couldn’t help but wonder if Emily and Mitch knew their son well at all. “ _ Damn it, _ ” Bobby muttered when he pulled the fat end of the tie through the loop and the whole thing fell apart. In a fit of anger he grabbed an unlit candle from the sink counter and tossed it into the shower letting it clatter onto the floor with a soft thud. Ray appeared at the bathroom door, knocking softly before opening it slowly.

“Everything going okay in here?” Ray asked, poking his head in through the crack between the door and the wall. Bobby looked up and his brain almost short circuit when he saw Ray’s hair slicked back the way it was. It looked like Rose even managed to put on some light eyeliner on his top eyelids, and Ray made it look  _ good _ . Bobby tabled his gay panic for later, the grief overwhelming him more. “What kind of guitarist doesn’t know how to tie a tie?” Ray asked with a glint in his eye. He stepped fully into the room and turned around to close the door... which only furthered Bobby’s gay panic because the suit Ray was wearing did  _ wonders _ for his ass.

“Uh… they weren’t a part of the band’s look. Mom and dad were too busy to teach me,” Bobby said, defending himself. He tried to avoid paying attention to how close they were standing together. 

He failed epically. 

Bobby blinked furiously, trying to concentrate when Ray reached up and placed a hand on his shoulder. There was a sort of energy pulling at them, tugging at something in his gut. It was the same sort of feeling he felt whenever he and Luke shared a mic. Bobby never stopped staring at Ray’s eyes, they sparkled like sapphire diamonds underneath the dim bathroom lighting. “Here,” Ray said sliding the tie around Bobby’s neck. “Let me help you. It’s easy see?” He asked, guiding Bobby’s hands through the motions of tying the knot. 

“Yeah,” Bobby said, his brain trying to catch up to what was happening. “Yeah, easy,” Bobby stammered out. When Ray finished loosening the knot so Bobby wouldn’t be choking he rested his hand on his shoulder, both of them suddenly keenly aware of how close they were actually standing. “Isn’t this an interesting little relationship you and I have?” Bobby asked, wiggling his eyebrows. Ray stumbled backwards, his back hitting the bathroom door. Bobby took a small step forward, but before things could go further Rose banged on the other side of the door startling them both.

“Sorry to be a cockblock  _ Ninos, _ but if we don’t leave now we’ll be late!” Rose yelled through the wooden door. Ray flushed a deep shade of pink time, and the blush somehow made him look  _ more _ attractive. Like Bobby didn’t have enough conflicted emotions to deal with already.

“We’re coming!” Ray called back, turning the doorknob and tripped over his own feet. Bobby watched as Rose caught him in a hug, wrapping her arms around him. The two of them looked happy, like they were actually  _ meant _ to be together. Technically speaking Bobby hadn’t given them an official answer to their offer yet but he… he couldn’t help but watch them interact with each other and wish he could be a part of it. He was so tired of being alone. He waited too long with Luke and the others, he didn’t want to miss his chance this time.

“Uh guys? Funerals? Dead bandmates?” Bobby said sarcastically, snapping his fingers to get their attention. “I’m the one in mourning here, shouldn’t I be getting the hugs?” Bobby asked, moving to walk past them just for Rose’s hand to latch around his wrist and pull him into their little hug session. Bobby let himself relax in Rose and Ray’s arms, the uneasy sense of being  _ home _ again settling in the back of his mind… something he hadn’t felt since the day his band died.

“You going to be okay?” Rose asked, pressing a soft kiss to his forehead. Bobby buried his face into her shoulder, Ray sandwiched him in from behind, wrapping his arms around the both of them. 

“Eventually. Not today but eventually,” Bobby promised, tears already starting to stain her really  _ nice _ looking dress. He sniffled and instead of pulling away from them like he usually did, he just let them hold him. Standing there, in the middle of their crappy LA apartment he could almost forget they were about to bury his best friends.

“We really gotta go now though,” Rose said pulling a tissue out of her purse to dab at Bobby’s cheeks. He reached up to lightly wrap his left hand around her right wrist, pulling it down until it rested on his waist. Her smile lit up the room, and Bobby knew Ray agreed with him when he said,

“Your eyes shine like stars.” Rose scoffed,

“They shine huh?” She asked, leaning forward until their noses were barely touching. Bobby blinked at their sudden lack of personal space. Ray leaned forward and planted a kiss to her cheek.

“Like the stars,” Ray corrected, finishing the compliment. “We have to go,” Ray said, sheepherding them both to the door. He grabbed Lucille’s keys from the hook by the door, holding it open for Bobby and Rose.

“Hey,” Rose said, stopping Bobby just before he left the apartment. “You left these on the bedside table.” She dug around in her purse until she managed to pull out his red suspenders. The suspenders that Luke bought him once as a gag gift after a gig but Bobby had held them close to his heart. They were the first gift someone got him without expecting something in return. Without expecting him to meet  _ impossible _ expectations. The suspenders that stir the feelings he had once felt for said lead guitarist. Bobby told Rose and Ray the truth the same day they asked him to join their relationship. That his bandmates aren't just close friends… he told them that he loved them. Instead of being called gross or a monster like he expected, Rose cried as she pulled him in for a hug, refusing to let him go.

“Rose I - I  _ can’t _ ,” Bobby said, his fingers gingerly running along the rough elastic of the straps. Rose smiled at him sadly, pushing the suspenders into his hands.

“He’d want you to wear them.” With Ray’s help she adjusted the straps and clipped the red suspenders on over his black dress shirt, completing his regular look. Except this time he wasn’t going off to play a gig. How could he when his band was dead? Ray placed a soft kiss to the back of Bobby’s head then a heavy jacket was slung over his shoulders and he realized it was Reggie’s leather jacket. He pulled his arms through the sleeves and shoved his fists into the pockets, lightly scraping his skin against the pocket zippers as he did so.

“Now can we go?” Bobby asked, suddenly feeling much smaller than usual. He didn’t  _ want _ to go to the funerals, but he knew he’d kick himself if he ditched. Not that Rose and Ray would let him get away with missing his friend’s funerals. They were annoying like that, being all supportive and caring of his mental health. Rose snaked her arm under his and the three of them walked out to Lucille, using each other for support.  _ Now or never, _ Bobby thought as he climbed into the backseat of the van so he didn’t have to let go of her.

* * *

Bobby sat in the back of the pews in Hamilton's big Catholic church, Rose and Ray on either side of him. Ray’s left arm was stretched across the back of the pew so he let Bobby lean into his chest. Rose’s head rested on Bobby’s shoulder, trying to comfort him through the waves of shaking tears crashing through him. From the second Bobby saw the two caskets sitting in the front of the church Bobby started to cry. It wasn’t loud ugly crying, but quiet sniffles as tears streaked down his cheeks blurring his vision. The rest of the service passed by and all Bobby could think about was that Luke would’ve  _ hated _ being buried in a suit. 

When the actual service was over and Alex and Luke were buried six feet under fresh dirt Bobby found himself sitting in a table shoved against the wall in the reception hall, Reggie’s jacket hanging of the back of his chair. Bobby was shaking in his seat next to Rose, while Ray was sitting across from them at the small table. Bobby’s heart twisted in his chest, clenching under the weight of just burying his three friends. He felt tense, his shoulder blades tightening under Ray’s borrowed dress shirt. His fingers traced the red SOLO cup he filled with beer before finding a table. “Bobby, do you want to leave?” Ray asked, leveling with him. Bobby shook his head curtly. He knew Rose and Ray wouldn’t judge him. They’d get up and walk him straight out the door without questioning him or complaining… but Bobby felt like he had to stay at the reception. Like… like his duty as Sunset Curve’s acting bodyguard hasn’t ended yet.

“‘Who’re you?” A man’s voice drilled behind him, tugging at Reggie’s jacket. Bobby flinched at the sudden movement, Rose’s fingers tightening between his. “One a Reg’s fag friends?” Bobby could smell the alcohol on the man’s breath without even turning around. He clenched his left fists - the one Rose wasn’t holding - his fingernails dug into the meat of his palm.

“Always a pleasure Mr. Sinclair,” Bobby said through gritted teeth. “Enjoying the free beer?” He asked, finally turning to face Reggie’s alcoholic father in the flesh. Mr. Sinclair kept trying to grab Reggie’s jacket from the back of Bobby’s chair, so Bobby grabbed it and pulled it on.

“You always were the troublemaker  _ Wilson _ ,” Mr. Sinclair said, spitting his last name like an insult. “Pretentious assholes ‘nt e’en bury my son.” The air grew tense around them as Bobby seethed in his silence, balling his fists in the pockets of Reggie’s jacket. “It’s his jacket, I should get it. Sell it for a pretty penny.” Bobby pulled his fist back, but before he could hit Mr. Sinclair’s jaw Ray’s arms wrapped around his, pinning them to his back.

“I think it’s time you leave us alone… Mr. Sinclair was it?” Ray asked, sounding dangerously calm. Bobby couldn’t remember a time he heard Ray sound so  _ angry _ . Rose stood up from her seat, crossing her arms as she stood next to him.

“You a fag too?” Mr. Sinclair sneered, leaning so close to them Bobby could smell the rank of his body oder. Rose’s eyes narrowed but Ray was the one who spoke up first, cutting into whatever she was going to say.

“You need to  _ leave _ ,” Ray insisted, still holding onto Bobby even though he gave up on trying to fight Mr. Sinclair.

“Robert are you causing a problem?” A man said, walking up with his wife. Bobby felt like he knew them from somewhere he just… couldn’t remember where he knew them from. They looked exhausted, both of their eyes were tired and their faces splotched with red patches of dried tears… but their eyes shined with concern and kindness.

“Whatever,” Mr. Sinclair said, stealing the second half of Bobby’s cup, gulping it down and crushing the empty cup under his foot as he stalked away. When it was clear Mr. Sinclair wasn’t coming back, Bobby let Rose pull him in for a hug as a new wave of tears washed over him, leaving him shaking like a leaf in Rose’s arms. His speech was a discordant mess, babbling words strung together telling her he was sorry for staining her pretty black dress.

“I don’t care about the dress amour,” Rose whispered, pressing a kiss to his temple. “I can always wash it when we get home.” The word home stuck to the back of Bobby’s mind.  _ Home is a people not a place… _ Reggie’s voice sang as his silly little country song pushed the shadows in his mind back. Ray joined their little pity party, his strong arms once again finding their way wrapped around the both of them. He pressed his face into the back of Bobby’s hair, nuzzling his nose into it. “You’re strong. You need to remember that, you’re so strong.” Rose said, squeezing him tightly. “You’re going to get through this.” Bobby swallowed thickly, nodding in response. He couldn’t trust himself to speak in fear of crumbling to pieces in front of Alex and Luke’s family. Speaking of the other guests the two people who helped diffuse the altercation were standing awkwardly near them.

“You’re Bobby right?” The woman said, her eyes sparkling like Luke’s did when he was worried Bobby spent the night drunk again. “You were in Luke’s band?”  _ Emily _ , Bobby’s mind supplied the name kicking him into focus. He turned around in his seat, looking up at her. She looked different from the last time he saw her, she looked like she aged twenty years - not just three.

“Mr. and Mrs. Patterson uh… hi,” Bobby said, staring at the floor. Rose nudged him and he reached out his hand to shake hers. Emily smiled at him but her eyes were red from crying during the funeral service. Bobby figured he wasn’t looking much better himself.

“Thank you for taking care of him… when he wouldn’t let me help him anymore,” Emily said, tears threatening to fall down her face again. Bobby nodded, his eyes blurring again. Rose intertwined their fingers behind his back, squeezing his hand in a silent show of support. “Was he… was he good?” She asked. After a long deep breath Bobby unstuck his throat and managed to speak out loud.

“He was the best,” Bobby said. A beat of silence passed then Bobby said, “he was going to be a  _ legend _ .” Memories started to flash through his mind of him and his boys. 

Band sleepovers on cold nights so Luke didn’t have to sleep in the studio alone. Arguing with Luke over cords for the songs, inevitably settling on a melody that made Luke’s eyes shine brighter than the sun. When Bobby had to stay with Luke in the studio until he fell asleep because the guilt from running away was eating at him. The exact moment Bobby knew he fell in love with Luke, when they finished their first run through of _Now Or Never_. They were all sweaty and the studio was hot but Luke looked like he was on top of the world, it took weeks for that amazing smile to leave his face. Then a week later they played the demo version at a gig and the _dumbass_ smile was back. Luke’s energy was contagious, Bobby fed off of it like a leech. _God, what he wouldn’t do to be able to see Luke smile like that again._

“I wish… I wish I knew more about his life,” Emily admitted, dabbing at her cheek with a handkerchief. “I suppose I just never wanted him to get hurt playing music. It’s such a hard industry to get into…” Emily said, trailing off. Bobby hesitated then offered,

“I can stop by one day and give you a demo of our cd. We made enough copies for everyone to get one. He’s the lead on all of the songs.” His right hand started shaking so he balled it into a fist and shoved it into his pocket. “Maybe uh… you’ll be able to listen to him sing and find out what made him special.” Something settled in her eyes, it wasn’t pity or grief… it was a look of understanding.

“You loved him didn’t you?” Emily asked, reaching a shaky hand up to cup Bobby’s cheek. Bobby nodded, his lip quivering as another round of waterworks threatened to pour through him again.

“I did,” Bobby said, finally voicing his emotions for the first time since he met the boys. “I loved all three of them.” His legs grew wobbly so he let Ray guide him back into his seat. “I loved them,” Bobby said again. Hearing the words sounded weird, it made his feelings  _ real _ , like they actually mattered… but like always he was too late to recognize them. His boys were gone, they were gone and this time they would never walk through the studio doors again. Emily took mercy on him, pressing a motherly kiss to the top of his head before turning to Rose.

“You let me know if you three ever need anything got it?” Emily asked, handing Rose a piece of paper with her number on it. Rose nodded, smiling back at her,

“We will Mrs. Patterson, thank you.” Mercifully, she and Mitch both decided to leave the three of them alone, Bobby now a shaky mess in Rose’s arms again. Funny how that seemed to happen more often than not nowadays.

“Shh amour,” Rose said, carding her hand through Bobby’s hair as he nuzzled into the nape of her neck. “I know they loved you too. I saw it when you played together. Energy like that? There’s no faking it amour,” she said before starting the soft hum of a song Bobby didn’t recognize. Rose had a pretty voice, her chest breathing slowly to the beat of her song.

“That was pretty,” Bobby said when she trailed off halfway into it. He pulled out of her arms and grabbed a napkin from the table to dry his now tear-stained cheeks. Rose smiled at him, her eyes glistening with excitement.

“Good. I’m writing it for you amour,” she said, raising Bobby’s hand so she could kiss along his knuckles. Bobby looked around the hall and was surprised to see how emptier it seemed now that it was just the initial family. He felt out of place, like he was intruding on their personal mourning time.

“Can we go home?” Bobby asked, blinking furiously as he tried to stay awake. The familiar jingle of Lucille’s keys sounded in the air. Ray leaned down from behind him and planted a kiss on his cheek, smiling against his skin.

“Of course quierdo. Rose?” Ray asked, like he wasn’t already helping Bobby stand up and walk towards the door.

“Home,” Rose responded with a nod. Despite having just buried his two best friends and cremating the third (they had to pick up Reggie’s ashes on the way out) Bobby couldn’t help but feel something warm settle in his chest. Something like what he felt for Luke and his boys… a sense of family, a sense of love… a sense of  _ home _ .

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Raybse owns my soul at this point. I'm never going to be free of gaypanic-pining bobby am I? Jon if you read this I wholeheartedly blame you for how long this chapter ended up being lmao.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ray and Trevor both get the opportunity to have a heart to heart with their children.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi.
> 
> Have another chapter. This one isn't as angsty as the others so you're welcome. Also, it's in Trevor and Ray's pov cause i wanted to branch out a little bit. Let me know how this one went!
> 
> Enjoy!
> 
> ~ R

Trevor noticed the difference in his daughter the second she walked through the den with a bounce in her step and a smile on her face. The last time she was this happy was when she came home after her first date with Nick. It was a nice surprise from her typical after school stomp into her dance studio and locking herself in the room all hours of the day only to come out to eat. “Carrie, something happened at school?” Trevor asked, trying to act like he wasn’t ecstatic at seeing this happy-bubbly version of his daughter making an appearance. Carrie froze and turned to face him in surprise.

“Dad what are you doing home so early?” Carrie asked, Trevor hated how shocked she sounded. He hadn’t exactly been the best father to her as of late, with her constant Dirty Candi rehearsals and his manager breathing down his neck for him to release a twenty-five year celebration album. Those were god awful excuses though, and they both knew it.

“I got some time off from the label. I was hoping… maybe we could have movie nights like we used to?” Trevor asked, hoping she was going to say yes. Moving Nights Wilson-style meant a bucket of popcorn the size of a sink tub, candy boxes stacked like Jenga blocks. It meant they’d drag the mattresses down from the bedrooms and shove the couches to the side so they could build one of the best damn pillow forts in the world. Most importantly Wilson Movie Nights were for family. They meant he and Carrie could spend time together, just the two of them watching bad Netflix rom-coms until the morning sun glare was so bad they had to stop.

“I’d like that dad,” Carrie said, her eyes glistening with excitement. “I’d actually really like that. Bad Netflix rom-coms?” She asked, setting her phone face down on the table. Trevor smiled so wide it hurt his face.

“Is there any other way to have movie night Care?” He asked, warmth filling his heart at seeing his daughter so happy. Then her phone pinged and the moment was gone, her fingers flying across the touchscreen at an impossible rate. He half-expected her thumbs to fall off given how fast she was typing.

“Sorry dad, Julie’s texting me about this thing we’re planning. Hey, keep your Saturday free this weekend alright?” Carrie asked, her footsteps thudding upstairs. “I’ll bring down the mattresses if you get the blankets!” She shouted when she turned down the hallway towards her bedroom. Trevor shook his head with a sigh, standing up so he could push the couches into position. He was happy to hear Carrie was on speaking terms with Ray’s daughter again. To be honest Trevor never really found out the real reason why Carrie stopped talking to Julie to begin with. He should have been there for her more, instead of hiring nanny after nanny and letting Ray raise her after they spent five years not talking to each other.

“Carrie! I’ll be in the garage!” Trevor shouted in the direction of Carrie’s room. Without waiting for a response Trevor walked into the garage, heading straight toward the shelving unit with neatly stacked clear boxes. All he had to do was get the two boxes with extra blankets and go back inside the house - that was it - no detours, no trips down memory lane… but then he saw  _ the _ box. The box that was stuck in the back of the bottom shelf, jammed against the wall meant to gather dust and never see the light of day again. Trevor pulled out the blanket boxes, leaving them on the ground next to him so he could crawl into the back of the shelf and grab the medium-sized Nike shoebox. The dust on the box was so old it turned his fingers grey when he swiped away at it to reveal his messy scrawl in Sharpie on the lid.

_ Rose & Ray. _

Rose and Ray. 

This was his Rose and Ray box.

He dropped it on the ground like it burned him.

“Fuck,” Trevor muttered, sagging onto the floor ignoring the chill of the cement he felt through his jeans. Reaching forward gingerly he flicked open the lid, the dust settling on the ground. He sniffled and used the back of his hand to wipe the offending tears that threatened to fall down his face. He hadn’t thought about Ray in ages.  _ That’s a lie, _ a traitorous voice in the back of his head hissed. Trevor sniffled again as he peeked into the box, sifting through the rubber banded bundles of love letters and polaroids and half finished yellow-edged love songs. He sniffled again, wiping his nose off on the collar of his t-shirt.

He’d forgotten how happy he was. How happy he  _ could’ve _ been… if he just told Ray the truth like Rose asked. But Ray didn’t deserve that. He didn’t deserve the shit the label shoved down his throat when they convinced him to steal Luke’s songs. Ray was good, he was warm, he made Trevor feel  _ alive _ . 

Even now, years after the day Trevor up and left the apartment when he was home alone because he was a  _ coward _ and didn’t want to confront Ray in person and see the hurt twist his face into something it should never be. 

Even now whenever Trevor saw Ray smile at a school function, or in a Walmart, or during his fucking morning run his chest filled with warmth. He dropped the bundle of photos that he was holding in his hands, the polaroids scattering onto the floor around him.  _ When did he start shaking? _ He inhaled through his nose, a long uncertain breath and he could almost imagine Ray and Rose sitting on either side of him, coaching him through the anxiety attack. “I’m sorry,” Trevor said, a whimper caught in the back of his throat. He pulled his knees to his chest, wrapping his arms around them.

“Dad, did you get the blankets?” Carrie asked, her voice coming around from behind one of his cars. Trevor sniffled then shoved the polaroids back into the shoebox, tossing it back onto the shelf. “Dad, you okay?” Carrie asked, stepping into his line of sight. Trevor nodded, trying to stop his nose from sniffling. Without question she charged forward and buried her face in his chest squeezing her arms around his back. Trever wrapped his own arms around her and hugged her back.

“Yeah I got the blankets,” Trevor said, gesturing to the two clear boxes clearly labeled as  _ extra blankets _ on the side. Carrie nodded then she frowned slightly, noticing the old dust on the floor and a polaroid he missed when he tried to clean up the mess. Trevor reached out and shoved the extra photo into his pocket before she could see who was in it.

“What happened dad, why are you crying?” Carrie asked, eyeing the box which was tipped sideways on the shelf. Trevor shook his head and stood up with a stretch.

“Just remembering things, an ex. Let’s go do movie night yeah? I think we still have that one extra fluffy blanket you always liked buried in one of these boxes somewhere,” he said, stacking the two blanket boxes before picking them up with a groan. He was getting too old for this, but a movie night was long overdue. Carrie glanced at the  _ Rose & Ray  _ box again but didn’t say anything about it.

“Yeah dad,” Carrie said, though her eyes still shined with concern. “Let’s go have a movie night.” She took the top box from him and walked back into the house, with him at her heels.

* * *

When Ray walked into the studio he expected to see the boys setting up for after school practice. He expected to hear Alex warming up on the drums, and Reggie and Luke fighting over what decibel the amps should be at so they wouldn’t overpower each other. What he didn’t expect was to find a still empty garage. The afternoon sun streamed through the windows, the dust settling in the air as the silence fell heavy on Ray’s shoulders. “What is this doing out?” Ray wondered, noticing his little shoebox sitting on the top of the piano. He took another quick glance around the studio in case one of his sons ended up pulling it out, most of the pictures did have Trevor - Bobby - in them after all… but aside from a sudden chill in the air from a gust of wind he was alone.

Ray remembered what dating Rose and Bobby was like, the memory of Rose’s crystal clear laugh and Bobby’s warm chuckle ingrained forever in his mind. The way Rose always seemed to know what was wrong before Ray or Bobby even realized something was wrong in the first place. He found himself sitting on the piano bench, sifting through the contents of his box. 

The polaroids capturing the moments pure love shined in their eyes. The time Ray tried and failed at baking holiday cookies, the flour covering her face as Bobby helped clean up her face with a fresh towel. They all looked so  _ young _ . Ray and Rose just signed the lease on their second apartment - the three of them decided they needed a bigger space after Bobby officially moved in with them - and Bobby had just started playing music again, acoustic only. The song Bobby wrote for Ray laid at the top of the box, the melody playing in his mind as he hummed the tune.

A tear fell rolled down his nose and dropped onto the sheet of notebook paper with Bobby’s uneasy scrawl scribbled across the page. Then, reaching into the box for a second time Ray pulled out a piece of paper stuck in the bottom. The letter Trevor wrote, asking for his forgiveness. Begging for Ray to not hate him for up and leaving one day with no explanation. The day Ray’s heart was torn in half, split right down the middle and fell out of his chest. He never did learn the real reason Bobby - or Trevor he supposed, since that was right around when Bobby was changing his stage name - up and left them in the middle of the day while Ray was at a photoshoot. He couldn’t even remember what the shoot was for, he couldn’t remember how he got home. He couldn’t remember what his first thought was when he realized Bobby’s acoustic was missing from it’s stand in the living room…

“Dad are you okay?” Carlos asked, appearing suddenly at his side. Ray sniffled, wiping his tears away with the back of his sleeve. He dropped the songs and pictures back into the box and secured the lid over it.

“I’m fine mijo,” Ray said with a weak smile. Luckily he hadn’t cried a lot, which meant his eyes weren’t all red and puffy and gross. “Promise,” he insisted when Carlos crossed his arms and stared at him pointedly.

“Right, and Julie’s band isn’t made up of half-ghost humans,” Carlos said with an eye-roll. Ray shifted, leaning against the piano so Carlos couldn’t see the box. His son always impressed him with how introspective he’d gotten since the ghost boys had come into their lives. Ray would forever be grateful to Luke, Alex, and Reggie for bringing his daughter back.

“Why’d you come in here if the boys aren’t playing?” Ray asked, deliberately changing the subject. Carlos just shrugged in response and shoved his hands into his sweatshirt pockets.

“Julie said she and Reg wanted to tell you something. I donnou, they’re in her room,” Carlos said with a look on his face Ray couldn’t quite place. Ray reached out to ruffle Carlos’s hair and despite the kid’s complaining he knew he liked the attention.

“I’ll go check on them. Let’s go back inside before it gets cold yeah? Spaghetti for dinner?” Ray asked, half-dragging Carlos behind him as they both made their way back to the main house.

_ “I don’t know Reg. What if he doesn’t like people like me?” _ Julie’s voice whispered, floating through the crack of her opened door. Ray froze just before he walked into the room. From his vantage point Ray could see both Julie and Reggie sitting on her bed, criss crossed facing each other. Julie’s small travel make up kit was lying between them and she was putting eyeliner on Reggie’s face.

“Don’t be ridiculous Jules. Ray’s like, the best dad ever. He’ll never hate you for being who you are,” Reggie said, checking his reflection in a small mirror. Ray cleared his throat then knocked lightly on the door to announce his presence. Reggie poofed off the bed and into Julie’s desk chair as he entered the room.

“Mija is everything okay? Carlos said you wanted to talk to me about something,” Ray said, taking a hesitant step forward. Julie switched sitting positions, swinging her legs off the side of her bed. She patted the empty space next to her so Ray sat next to her, keeping an eye on Reggie, who’s anxiety seemed to be through the roof.

“Yeah uh.. I just uh… Carrie and I started talking again,” Julie said, suddenly unconfident in herself. Ray blinked in surprise considering he wasn’t expecting her to say something as simple as that. Julie was tense, picking at her bracelets and refusing to make eye contact with him. There was more to the story.

“That’s great mija,” Ray said, hoping he was doing the right thing. “How’s she doing?”

“She’s great dad, her and Flynn are both really  _ really _ great.” Julie said and the gears started to turn in Ray’s head.  _ Now things are starting to make more sense, _ Ray thought as he let his daughter try to process her thoughts. “I like them both a lot… but I also like Luke a lot… and I did some research and there’s this thing…” She trailed off and started to fiddle with her bracelets again, this time Ray noticed it was the one that was made up of the bisexual flag colors. “And Reggie said he likes guys and girls too so I knew I wasn’t weird but he didn’t have a name for it so we looked it up and -”

“- it’s called bisexuality?” Ray asked her, a soft knowing smile on his face. Julie looked at him, her jaw dropped in shock. A choked dying fish sound came from the direction Reggie was sitting. “Julie, I’m bisexual too. It’s okay if you like boys and girls, heck you can even date more than one person at the same time as long as everyone knows what’s going on.” Ray said, letting her bury her face in his chest as he wrapped his arms around her.

“Thanks for being so cool about this dad,” Julie said, pulling away from him to wipe at her tears. Ray nodded, smiling at both her and Reggie.

“Mija all I care about is your happiness,” he said, planting a kiss at the top of her head like Rose used to do. Julie sniffled then reached over to her bedside table for a tissue to blow her nose.

“But you deserve to be happy again too dad,” Julie said though her sniffles. Ray accepted the tissue she offered him to dry his eyes. He wanted to be happy too, happy and in love again just like he was with Rose and Trevor, but that wasn’t an option anymore, obviously. Being in a relationship with Trevor was a thing of the past, even if he’d jump at the chance if Trevor rang his doorbell again. Kissing the top of her head again Ray said,

“Mija you and Carlos are what make me happy. Your boys are what make me happy every single time you play. I don’t need to find someone else since I’m surrounded by mis hijas e mis hijos.” She didn’t look like she believed him and, if he was being honest with himself… Ray couldn’t exactly believe what he said either. Loving with an empty heart was going to give him more problems in the future, but right now all that mattered was that Julie knew he’d be there for her.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In a whirlwind of time Ray goes from a life filled with love to waking up in a cold bed left to wonder what he did wrong.
> 
> or
> 
> this is the super angsty breakup chapter I've been wanting to write since I started writing for Raybse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm planning on writing an extended version of this one and posting it as it's own fic because I just love hurting Ray so much. Also, I might replace this version with the edited version but idk yet. uhhhh please don't kill me for this.
> 
> Enjoy!
> 
> ~ R

Their relationship blossomed the first few years they were together. Ray would cook them breakfast and his reasons to live would walk into the kitchen grumbling about how it was too early even though he let them sleep in until twelve in the afternoon on Saturdays most weekends. Bobby would have sloppy lipstick marks splotched on his face and Rose’s hair would be a frazzled mess but they’d kiss him good morning and Bobby would get that mischievous glint in his eyes and Ray knew they were okay. Because that was who they were. They lived the perfect white-picket-fenced life plus one person, minus the picket fence. Things were good, and Ray worked harder to make more money and he took more photography gigs because maybe the reason that his petals were fighting

Then one day something inside of Ray shifted. Something inside of his gut churned and wilted and fell to the floor in a pile of ash while he was waiting for Ray and Rose to come on his off day. When they  _ did _ come home Rose was obviously pissed about something. She barged into the apartment doing that thing she did when she got angry and was mumbling things in Spanish that sounded like death threats. Bobby trailed in after her with that distant look in his eyes he got whenever he was thinking about his boys, whenever he was thinking about  _ Sunset Curve _ . Ray watched from the kitchen as Rose slammed the bedroom door shut, the foundations of their apartment shuttering under the force of her anger. “It didn’t go as planned,” Bobby said, still standing in the doorway, Reggie’s leather jacket clutched close to his chest.

“What do you mean?” Ray asked him, taking a hesitant step forward. The way Bobby was acting reminded Ray of a kicked puppy left out in the rain. It reminded him of the way Bobby acted when he left them one night because he thought he was overstaying his welcome.

“Don’t get angry!” Bobby exclaimed, holding up a hand as he slammed the apartment door shut behind him. “But uh… they didn’t really like my songs…” His eyes shined with so much pain Ray wanted to drive straight down to the agency and punch the producer in the face. There seemed to be some sort of hidden meaning behind the way he said  _ his _ songs, but Ray couldn’t think about that. Not while one of the loves of his life was standing in front of him in so much pain.  _ No wonder Rose is pissed, Bobby works his ass off harder than anyone _ , Ray thought as he took another hesitant step forward. Bobby didn’t skirmish this time, which Ray tallied in the metaphorical win column in his head.

“I’m so sorry Bobby,” Ray said, itching to swallow Bobby up in a hug. He and Rose learned from past experiences, in times of emotional distress they had to let Bobby come to them otherwise he’d bolt and bunker down for three straight days and refuse to talk to them. Luckily Bobby didn’t need much of an invitation, rushing forward and burying his head into Ray’s chest a shaking mess of tears and loss. “It’s going to be okay,” Ray promised, wrapping his arms around Bobby. They both winced when they heard the sound of Rose shouting and a ceramic vase hitting one of the bedroom walls. “She’s not angry at you mariposa. I’m sure of it,” Ray whispered, pressing a kiss to the top of Bobby’s head. Bobby just wrapped his arms around Ray tighter, fists knotting into the back of his shirt.

Later that night, after everyone’s meltdowns were finally settled and Bobby’s eyes were dried and his hiccups were at a manageable pace Ray sat between both of his loves, arms holding them close to his chest as they slept soundlessly into the night. “Everything is fine Ray _ , _ ” Rose whispered as she fell asleep curled onto his shoulder.

That was the first time Rose had lied to him, and he was too much of a fool to realize it wasn’t going to be the last.

Days turned into months and the months turned into years and all Ray was able to do was sit on the sidelines and watch as thorns grew out of Rose’s sides. They used to have fun together, when it was just the two of them… but now she just seemed tense all the time and the one day Ray tried to plan a date for them all to go on Bobby had to bail because of a meeting with a new label exec. He didn’t understand much about the music industry but Ray knew that if the exec called you had to go in so he let it slide.

And then one day Bobby missed their anniversary for a gig and he and Rose spent the night having a floor picnic because the original plan got rained out.

Their relationship; Ray realized one day, was like a Rose. Like the flower she was named for, strong when it bloomed but delicate. Held together by a bundle of petals like they were, each of them a petal surrounding their love for each other. But then one day, a year into whatever the hell was happening between Rose and Bobby, Ray watched as his petals slowly wilted, curling at the edges as the tension grew to the point of being a string pulled at by both ends.

Bobby changed his name to Trevor and his first album hit the top charts for six months straight, but instead of celebrating like Ray was, Rose celebrated her way straight into the bottom of a vodka bottle. Ray had to help her back into their apartment after getting the call that his girlfriend was passed out at the counter. Bobby was already sleeping on the couch, so when Ray dropped Rose face-first onto their bed he just collapsed into it next to her, trying his best to ignore the wilted flower petals crumbling to dust around him.

Ray woke up to a cold bed the next morning, a quickly scribbled down thank you note from Rose stuck to his forehead bearing the explanation that she was late to work. Ray huffed and pulled the pillow back over his head. He  _ hated _ sleeping in, but the empty and still apartment didn’t exactly give him a reason to wake up. So he fell back to sleep, twisted around the thick thrifted quilt Rose brought home one day after pulling a long shift at the diner. Ray curled around the blanket, clutching one of Bobby’s old pillows to his chest. If he pressed his face into and inhaled hard enough he could almost taste the smell of Bobby’s aftershave and the old smokes he used to buy before Ray finally convinced him to quit.

And then one day Ray woke up to a cold bed and Bobby’s pillow was missing.

And then one day he walked around the apartment with the morning sun shining through the windows and he realized Bobby’s guitar was missing... which wouldn’t have worried him except for the fact Bobby took his duffle bag and Reggie’s leather jacket and the keys to Lucille and Luke's journal was missing from it's place of rest on the bookshelf.

And so when Rose found him eight hours later Ray was peeled apart piece by piece, kneeling on the cold kitchen floor with Polaroids and petals littering the ground around him.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone: have fun on yout date Julie!
> 
> Julie: *bisexual panic* it's not a date!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *rises from beyond the grave*
> 
> I am so sorry for leaving you all with that angsty ass chapter for so long! Hopefully this makes up for it! Also, Julie needs to find herself some braincells.
> 
> Enjoy!
> 
> ~ R

Julie woke up with a weight on her chest. That wasn’t a metaphor. She opened her eyes to the sight of Carlos sitting on her stomach with his legs crossed and an adorable looking pout on his face. “Ugh go away dumbass it’s Friday,” Julie complained, grabbing a spare pillow to whack Carlos, knocking him over. “Parent teacher conferences,” she contined, pulling her quilt back over her head. “Neither of us have school.”

“It’s ten in the morning Jules!” Carlos complained, flopping onto the bed next to her. He mimicked the movement of making snow angels, purposely hitting her as he did so. “Dad said to wake you up. Also, I’m pretty sure Luke has new lyrics to show you because according to Reggie he’s been holed up in the studio all night.  _ Also _ also, Carrie’s finally taking you out on your first date!” He exclaimed, bouncing around her room like he was on a sugar high. Julie tried to process everything he just said.

“Uh, we’re trying to find out what to do with dad and Trevor. It’s not a  _ date _ date Carlos. She’s just showing us a few ideas she had. And Luke always has new song lyrics. Alex and Reggie once told me he spent an entire  _ week _ locked down in the loft.” Julie said, watching as Carlos pulled open her closet doors and started to root through her outfits. “What are you doing?” She asked, watching as Carlos dug out her entire wardrobe looking for something - at least she  _ hoped _ he was looking for something, otherwise she’d be angry that he woke her up before noon on her first day off in months for no reason.

“Found it!” Carlos exclaimed victoriously, crawling out of her closet holding one of her ‘fancy’ floral dresses. He held it up in the air, shaking all the wrinkles out. “The last time you wore this Flynn couldn’t talk in full sentences the entire day!” Carlos said, a grin stretching across his face. Julie sighed and pulled her hair up into a ponytail. She smiled at her brother, took the dress from him and shoved him out of her room so she could get ready for the long day ahead of her. She dug around in her wardrobe herself to find a different outfit but the only other actually clean thing she owned was a disney sweatshirt with dumbo on it. Not even her mom’s old clothes were clean; Julie had yet to wash them because - well - because she was lazy. She had more important things to worry about than washing clothes. Like this Not Date with Flynn and Carrie.

“Julie! Flynn and Carrie are here!” Her dad yelled up the stairs. Julie frantically pulled on the floral dress over her head and sprayed her hair with dry shampoo, trying to tame the matted mess it became overnight.

“Coming dad!” Julie shouted before closing her bedroom door again. She turned around and yelped when she saw Luke sitting on her bed, his legs hanging off the side of it. “What are you  _ doing _ here?” She hissed, turning back to her vanity mirror to try to brush through a more complicated clump of knots.

“Don’t you want to see me?” Luke pouted, appearing behind her - not that she could see him in the mirror, one of the downsides of being a ghost they discovered. Julie let out a groan of frustration when she couldn’t get her brush through a rather difficult section of her hair.

“Yes, but not when I have to leave for a date!” Julie exclaimed, tugging at the stuck hairbrush. Luke’s hand met hers and he slowly took the brush from her.

“Take a breath,” Luke whispered, taking the brush away from her. Julie followed his long breathing patterns, getting her own pattern under control. He started to brush her out for her, getting out the rough patches. “Better?” He asked, tying off the french braid at the end with a ponytail he grabbed from her desk counter. Julie took a shaky breath before nodding in response.

“Yeah, better. How’d you uh… how’d you learn how to braid like this?” Julie asked softly, twisting the unbraided ends around with her fingers. Luke just turned to face her with a bittersweets smile.

“Alex’s little sister liked to have her hair braided, I just picked it up from him I guess. Especially back when he’d grow out his hair,” Luke explained with a shrug. “Now you look amazing,” Luke said, pinning a blue butterfly clip in Julie’s hair. She could feel her ears heat up when she blushed.

“Thanks,” Julie said, grabbing her purse off the hook behind her bedroom door. “I mean it Luke. Just… thank you.” Luke pulled her in for a hug. Julie really liked Luke’s hugs, his chest made a great pillow… then all of a sudden his warmth disappeared.

“Good luck on your date!” Luke hissed, right before he poofed away. Julie threw her hairbrush in the general direction he used to stand in.

“It’s. Not. A.  _ Date! _ ” Julie whisper-shouted at the empty air. Allowing herself one last minute to pull herself together before swinging her door open and walking downstairs. “Sorry for the wait!” She exclaimed before gracefully tripping on the bottom step, heading straight for the floor.. Julie threw her hands out to catch herself before she hit the ground, but someone wrapped a hand around her wrist to hold her up. When Julie looked up to see who caught her she was met by Flynn’s warm brown eyes.

“You okay Jules?” Flynn asked, pulling Julie back up so she was standing. Julie nodded wordlessly, afraid if she tried to talk she wouldn’t be able to stop. Flynn was just wearing her everyday look, jeans, combat boots, her leather jacket… but something about her today made it look  _ hot. _ Carrie coughed loudly and Julie turned to see her leaning against the front door.

“You look uh… you look really good,” Carrie said, unable to keep her eyes off of Julie’s dress. Julie’s dad wrapped her up in a tight hug, Carlos following suit.

“Have her back home by nine ladies,” Carlos scolded, giving Carrie his best ‘man of the house’ glare. Over his head Julie watched as her dad mouthed  _ eleven _ . Carrie played along, smiling as she nodded in agreement.

“Nine ‘o clock on the dot little man,” Carrie said, reaching out to ruffle Carlos’s hair. “Ready for this?” She asked, looping her arm through Flynn’s, waiting for Julie’s response. Julie nodded, her brain still trying to play catch up to the fact that both Carrie and Flynn’s outfits made them look like literal goddesses.

“Julie, everything okay?” Flynn asked once the three of them were alone in the car, Carrie behind the driver’s wheel with Julie in the passenger seat. Flynn sat in the back, settled in the middle seat so she could lean forward and talk to them.

“Fine…” Julie mumbled, trying to gather her wits so she could stop panicking over how hard she was crushing on the two girls. “So uh Carrie, what’s the test date going to look like?” Julie asked, trying to take the focus of the conversation off of her.

“We tell our dads to wear something nice, and give them the address.” Carrie turned into the parking lot of a dog park. Flynn wrinkled her nose in confusion.

“You want your dads to realize their true love for each other in a dog park?” Flynn asked as Carrie pulled the gear into the park.

“No offense Carrie but uh… I was sort of expecting something more  _ glamorous _ …” Julie said hesitantly as Carrie pulled out two medium-sized picnic baskets.

“Trust me Jules,” Carrie said when Flynn reached up to slam the trunk door shut. “Sometimes glamorous isn’t always romantic. And if I remember correctly, didn’t your dad let us stay up for that meteor shower when we were thirteen? When he warned us not to quote, not _get up to_ _naughty business,_ unquote.” Julie shuddered when she recalled the memory of her dad thinking they were going to do something more than just snuggle.

“If you say so,” Julie said, holding the bundled up picnic blanket in her arms. “You’re the expert.” She followed her two girls - wait what? - out to the small pond as she clutched the blanket close to her chest. Despite spending the entire morning denying the fact that this was supposed to be a real date, seeing Carrie’s whole set up was starting to convince Julie otherwise. Carrie chose a really good spot for their impromptu picnic, close to the pond and sitting in the sun. The dog park was either closed or Carrie bought it out for the three of them because they were the only ones there, the silence filled by quietly playing music via Carrie’s bluetooth speaker.

“So uh… do you think our dads will like the set up?” Carrie asked hesitantly once they got everything situated. There was so much  _ food _ surrounding them, everything from chocolate covered strawberries to what looked like homemade turkey and cheese sandwiches were sitting on platters waiting to be eaten. Flynn stole a sandwich and moaned when she bit into it.

“Carrie this is a  _ perfect _ idea. As much as I wanted to set up some sort of debut performance they’ll love this a lot better,” Flynn said, handing Julie half of a sandwich. Julie took it but didn’t eat it, she was still trying to figure out how she felt about her girls.

“Julie everything alright?” Flynn asked, reaching out to lightly touch her knee. Julie nodded, putting the sandwich down on a napkin in front of her.

“I think I like you Flynn,” Julie said, finally voicing the feelings that have been eating at her since the day they met. She tried to get over crushing on Flynn by crushing on Nick, but then Carrie and Nick dated so that plan sort of fell through. Flynn frowned, but a wide smile split across Carrie’s face.

“Oh thank  _ god _ !” Carrie exclaimed, her eyes lighting up. “I thought I was going to have to spell it out for you braincel-less bitches.” Flynn looked offended, then lunged forward and pressed her lips against Julie’s. Julie returned the kiss, pressing her lips against Flynn’s like kissing her is the oxygen she needs to breathe. Flynn pulled away first, leaving Julie behind in a daze of eyelid flutters and her heart beating like a rabbit.

“So,” Flynn said, her gorgeous brown eyes watching Julie’s reaction carefully. Julie let Flynn hold her hand and Flynn ran her hand over the back of her hand. “Was that uh… okay?” Flynn asked, her ears and nose starting to flush.  _ Say something idiot! _ Julie yelled at herself, trying to get her mouth to open and tell Flynn that everything was  _ perfect. _ Instead of telling Flynn she loved her, instead of saying it was the best kiss she received in her entire life what she actually said was:

“I’m a bicycle - uh - I mean I’m binoculars - no, that’s not it  _ damn it _ -” Julie stammered out, freudian slipping her way into a world of embarrassment. Flynn just kept smiling at her like she lit up the moon, and while Julie loved her smile... it made it harder for Julie to formulate actual sentences. While Julie was struggling to talk Carrie took her cure to lightly kiss Flynn on the cheek, leaving a smudge of lipstick behind.

“It’s alright Julie,” Carrie said, patting Julie’s shoulder sympathetically. “Take your time.” Julie mumbled for a few minutes, trying to compile comprehensive thoughts.

“Uh -  _ girls _ !” Julie exclaimed, feeling blush fill her cheeks as she hid behind the sandwich; pretending to eat it. Flynn just grinned at her and lowered the sandwich, leaning in for another kiss.

"Its okay Jules," Flynn promised, squeezing Julie's hand. "I know you like me too. If you're both okay with it I wanted to uh… bring up the topic of a possible polyamorous relationship between the three of us? Because I love you both  _ so _ much, I don't want to lose either of you." Flynn admitted as Carrie shifted, scooting so Flynn could lean into her. Julie nodded slowly, her fingers playing with her friendship bracelets.

"I'd love that Flynn," Julie promised.

"Me too," Carrie said, planting a kiss at the top of Flynn's head. "So, a good first date idea?" Carrie asked, recieving a slap to the arm from Julie.

"Hey! No fighting. Only snuggles," Flynn demanded, pulling Julie down to curl up next to her on the blanket. Carrie managed to fit the three of them in the frame of her phone screen, and captured the memory of their first date.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please let me know how I did! I love hearing from readers for all constructive criticism!
> 
> Also maybe I'm writing an Addams Family hybrid crossover with JatP.... maybe I'm not. You didn't hear it from me.
> 
> Yell at me on Tumblr: @Random-Nerd-3

**Author's Note:**

> Yell at me on Tumblr: @Random-Nerd-3


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